| The Nebraska town where a satirical movie | | | | who police have questioned as a witness. "I was |
| ridiculing aliens was filmed has been troubled | | | | driving home one night after getting high with my |
| recently by a number of mysterious missing | | | | buddies when my car just died. No nothing, right, |
| persons cases. | | | | so I get out to check under the hood but it's dark |
| Police have been unable to explain the | | | | outside. Suddenly I see a light from the sky and |
| disappearances of seven people over the last | | | | I'm like whoa I can see now. Thanks dude. I was |
| three days since release of the movie, "Be Mean | | | | able to fix my car, drive home and have a peanut |
| to a Green Alien if You See One Because They're | | | | butter sandwich before curfew." |
| Really Stupid on Top of Being Ugly" hit theaters. | | | | Postal worker David Seasons was last seen in the |
| The film, bolstered by Internet talk, grossed $183 | | | | area where Hanks' car broke down that night. |
| million during its first three days of screenings and | | | | Relatives say he was wearing a T-shirt |
| has brought millions of dollars in revenue to | | | | badmouthing aliens the night he went missing. |
| Valentine, Nebraska thanks to a clever marketing | | | | "Just leave us alone. He didn't mean you any |
| campaign by the film's creators. | | | | harm," a teary Rosa Seasons, David's sister, |
| In the picture the lead character becomes so | | | | pleaded. "Please give me my brother back. Probe |
| obsessed with the thought of intelligent life on | | | | him if you want but leave him in one piece. Oh, if |
| other planets that he wages a jealous and bitter | | | | you can get rid of that mole on his face go |
| campaign degrading and demoralizing space aliens | | | | ahead, but give him back to us soon. I've had it |
| as half-wits and numbskulls. | | | | up to here looking after his cat." |
| To help generate buzz, the film's makers granted | | | | What happened to Seasons and the six other |
| Valentine officials the sole license to design | | | | missing people remains a mystery but UFO |
| T-shirts insulting aliens that are similar to the | | | | experts agree bizarre lights in the sky and sudden |
| T-shirts the actor wears throughout the comedy. | | | | unexplained disappearances in a town now |
| Valentine's mayor, however, isn't amused at the | | | | infamous for mocking aliens through government |
| deal his political rivals cut with film makers. "I find | | | | authorized T-shirts are no mere coincidence. |
| this type of behavior reprehensible," an irate | | | | "This film and this town are tipping the balance of |
| mayor Ben Swindling said. "This so called work of | | | | power in the galaxy," UFO for Life expert Hubert |
| cinema is really a piece of garbage that fuels | | | | Davies said. "This is not a good thing for earthlings. |
| hatred and this town has no room whatsoever | | | | These creatures obviously have feelings and |
| for hate. We are hate-free. And you know what, | | | | emotions just like we do. My guess is they are |
| I really hate when this shit happens during an | | | | exacting revenge for a film that has been grossly |
| election year." | | | | successful at their expense. It's either that or |
| Officials with knowledge of the seven cases say | | | | Valentine carries the only brand of T-shirt these |
| they closely resemble one another. In each | | | | aliens want and can't find anywhere else in the |
| instance the victim was either wearing a T-shirt | | | | universe." |
| insulting aliens or was last seen near a movie | | | | While officials continue to investigate the cases, |
| theater. Eyewitness accounts have placed a single | | | | interest in Valentine has reached all-time highs. |
| bright object or light in the sky following each of | | | | The town has made national news and several |
| the disappearances sparking rumors of invaders | | | | other film makers have expressed excitement in |
| from space and alien abductions. | | | | Valentine as a potential shooting location. |
| "This is really weird," said 17-year-old Tyler Hanks, | | | | |